Music, Messages and the Magical 5 year old who gets it all.

My girls love music.  They come by it honestly, both my husband and I enjoy music immensely.  And I feed their fondness for music by indulging their requests when they ask for songs to be added to their iPods.  E, my five year old, is the one who most often asks for songs.  My parents supported my eclectic tastes so I try not to judge too harshly when she asks for something I'm sure will make my ears bleed.  And I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE it when she asks for something that I really like.

So when after we watched the Life Vest Inside - Kindness Boomerang video my friend shared on Facebook, she asked for the song on her iPod, I could hardly find it fast enough on iTunes to get it for her (and me).

I left town for a work trip the next day and this morning was the first morning I'd spent with them since putting the song on her iPod.  On the way to school, E say "thank you for putting that song on my iPod."
"Which song?" I asked.
"This one." And she played it.  It's a 'gets me in my tear ducts' song and I cry a little each time it hear it.  It's really beautiful in it's intention--even more beautiful than uplifting video that introduced me to it (I'm sure the song isn't new--I'm not up on current music the way I once was; can't seem to turn my Sirius FM off of First Wave).  E sang along to the parts she's already memorized.  There are a few places where the lyrics run together quickly and she has trouble discerning the words.  She actually thought it might be in Spanish so she asked me to translate.  I told her it wasn't in Spanish but I wasn't sure to which part she was referring.  She reversed the song and replayed the part:
     It's not about win or lose 'cause we all lose
     When they feed on the souls of the innocent blood
     Drenched pavement keep on moving'
     Though waters stay ragin'
Frankly, I couldn't repeat the verse exactly so I just explained that it was talking about how we all lose when we don't show love and ignore our responsibilities to each other. And that the song was about how we don't have to be that way.  And E piped up, "like how the construction worker stopped and helped the boy when everyone else just went past and the boy was happy and helped the lady who was afraid she couldn't get across the street fast enough with her bags and then everyone did something nice."
I got all choked up and had to catch my breath before I could reply.  I realize the video is not subtle in its message, but had been nearly a week since the first and only time E had seen it but she remembered all the kindnesses and why they were important.  "Yes, baby, exactly."
She played Matisyahu's One Day, all the way through again and then the next song, a favorite of mine by Live began. "You don't need no friends..." to which E responded "Yes, I do, I need my friends!  I don't like that part of this song, Mommy.  I like the other parts but I do need my friends"
Heaven is another 'gets me in my tear ducts' tune.  It was the song that made me really like the band, Live and ever since I found out I was having my first baby girl, I can hardly hear it without becoming a puddle of goo.  I love the song.  "No, honey, he's not saying you don't need friends, he's just saying that you don't need other people to know God.  People will sometimes tell you that God is one way or another.  Some people will even try to tell you there is no God because they haven't seen God or heard God."
E's response nearly made me need to pull over.  "People who can't see God aren't looking--God isn't really invisible.  God is everywhere and in everything.  And if people can't hear God, it's because they haven't found the quiet place their hearts to listen and hear God speak to them."
This child of mine, who perpetually chooses the path of most resistance when asked to go anywhere, this child who will do exact thing you told her not to do 30 seconds after you told her not to, this five year old little girl, gets it.  She knows what many adults have trouble articulating, even believing.  And these are her words.  I've not drilled this into her.  We do talk about God, but this her own interpretation and her own language.
It makes me happy beyond words that she is processing what she sees and hears and from all the noise that she is inundated with from TV, movies, music and stories, she is taking in the good stuff and putting it all in order.
As a mother, I will fret over lots of things regarding my girls, but I can rest easy knowing my little E's heart is definitely perfectly placed.

How did I get here?

I am 41 years old and I ran my first 5k road race today.  I've participated in several road races--Susan G Komen Race for the Cure 5ks, 2 or 3 times and the Bay to Breakers Road Race (a 12k) 7 times.  But I always walked or power-walked them.  For few of the Bay to Breakers races I actually walked at an average of a 12.30 minute mile. Almost a jog, but not.
Today I ran a full 3 miles straight.  Until this year I had never done that.  Two miles, yes (over 25 years ago), three, not until this year.  In the grand scheme of runners, I don't rate, not even for my age.  And frankly, this was more of a fun run than a real race.  But in the grand scheme of me, it's a  big ding dang deal.
There were a lot of things I had to give up to get here.
I had to give up a lot of previously held ideas.

• that I wasn't made for running
• that weather forecasts are good planning tools
• that it could be too cold to run
• that running was an instant weight loss program
• that exercising is something best done solo

I had to give up some other things too.

• excuses
• sleeping past 5 am regularly
• hating running
• crashing in the afternoons due to lack of energy

But the trade-off has been pretty amazing.  I have gained so much--more than I can list completely but here are a few highlights.

• quality time with a good friend
• realization that I actually can run
• realization that running in the cold is actually exhilarating and actually easier than running in the heat
• a reminder that fitness is as important as losing weight (though weight is slowly and healthily coming off)
• a confirmation that committing to a friend you would never willingly let down is an incredible motivator (I just wouldn't get up at 5 to run in the dark for myself)
• the joy of inspiring my daughter (she got up at 6 AM one morning to run with Pam and me  and wants to run the Color Run in Birmingham)
• the knowledge that very little can get in my way when I'm motivated (we ran in the pitch dark, the rain, the snow, windchills of 19 degrees, took on fearsome hills, and even clingy children).  
• greater alertness and energy, especially on the days that I run
• a tighter bond with my dog (she runs with us when I'm home)
• inspiration and support from others

Pam and I started our Ease into 5K program on January fourth.  We've run almost every other day since--sometimes two days in a row.  We have actually been running 5K or more on our workout runs for the past month.  The Nashville Color Run was the first official 5K road race we have participated in, thus far.  However, I'm already registered for another one next weekend, a lower key event closer to home--Lead Me to the Cross 5K sponsored Mount Zion Baptist Church.  The event proceeds are donated to their neighborhood fire department.  And I've also registered myself and my 5 year old daughter for the Color Run in Birmingham (she has asked to participate and is already excited about it).  

I still feel like my real test of will and spirit will be making it through our crazy hot summer, but I have confidence that we'll do it.  Pam was already mentioning buying gear in preparation for running next winter.  We've got plans, see.  

Teacher of the Year

There's a lot of talk about teachers these days.  Many of my friends are teachers so I know there are really great ones out there (yes, all my friends who teach are awesome at it--not my bias, just my good luck with having fabulous friends).  And many of my friends have had distressing experiences with their children's teachers, so I know there are some who might be better suited for something else.
Today, I'd like to talk about a really great public school teacher.  I think we should celebrate them more often.  I can't imagine the sort of challenge is must be to deal with a class of students with various backgrounds, unknown home lives and distinctive learning styles.  Add to that the general challenge of dealing with any 5 or 6 year old child, much less nearly 20 of them--I am not sure why anyone wants to do it other than they are called.
I learned a little while ago that E's kindergarten teacher was her school's teacher of the year.  I wasn't surprised.  I've seen this teacher in action, she really has a handle on her class while maintaining the sweetest southern disposition you've ever seen.  She doesn't appear to play favorites and her students all appear to adore her.  And she definitely seems to love her work.
E loves her so much she'll sometimes say her teacher's name when she means 'mom' and vice versa.  But E's affection for her may not be all that unique.  E loves learning and has always been fond of her teachers.  Still, I think there's something extra special about Mrs. Dutton.
I have heard great things about all the kindergarten teachers at Walter Jackson Elementary School.  So what is it that makes Mrs. Dutton "Teacher of the Year" caliber?  Well, I believe it's her heart.
She really seems to care deeply about the children in her class.  She's been wonderful about communicating with me about E's good and bad moments in class.  She's not just concerned with her learning but her character development as well--she wants her students to become educated AND good people.  She also has shown she is concerned with each child having a good experience at school--she doesn't want them to feel singled out or left out for anything they cannot help.
I've mentioned on occasion that my E has a peanut allergy.  She's not a the point of severe reactions but we'd like to keep it that way--especially since you often don't know they've reached that point until they do.  So we a careful with what she eats.  E is aware of the risk, asks questions when something is a new food and is very good at accepting when food may not be safe.  Naturally, we informed the school and specifically, told her teacher about this.
Mrs. Dutton has been thoughtful about contacting me if there is any suspect food someone has brought for snack and has even gone so far as to keep a stash of vetted chocolate bars for E to have in lieu of a potentially nutty option.
And today, I got this email from her:
Hello!  E made a 100 on her sight word test!!!  We are going to have ice cream with all the fixings.  Is there a specific type of ice cream she can have and what fixings (caramel, chocolate syrups, cherries, ready whip cream, etc.) can she have.  I can give her skittles and sprinkles if I need to.  I already have that.  I just want to make sure her treat is just as good as the rest!  Thanks so much!!
It's that last bit, "I just want to make sure her treat is just as good as the rest!" that makes Mrs. Dutton so special.  To me, it's the difference between a good teacher and a great teacher.  Putting out that kind of care, attention and love has got to be exhausting.  I am so glad she was recognized for being willing to give that much of herself, for being truly great!

And it doesn't hurt her street cred that this is what my daughter drew for me yesterday:

Pinterest Inspired Valentine's the Busy Mom Way

This month my work has me traveling every week of the month.  And I traveled the last two weeks in January.  So, I'm comfortable saying, I've been a little busy.

Last year my eldest daughter was all over Valentine's Day, wanting to start decorating in the middle of January.  This year, well, between my travel and weekends occupied by Girl Scout cookie sales, there's not much in the way of holiday decor for this minor season.

Still, the girls have school Valentine's parties (E has 2) to attend and needed Valentines to exchange.  And I'd already shown E some homemade Valentine ideas from Pinterest.  We'd already bought supplies.  We had to make them.  So we did.  

With 72 hours between trips, the girls and I made some Valentines.  

 

 E saw this on one of my boards and this had to be made.  I already had the lollipop bags and some card stock.  A fun font and stapler later and we had tasty treats for her classmates.  She especially liked taking part in filling the bags with the Starburst.  Her OCD streak showed a bit when she kept trying to do rows of single colors.  Clearly, I filled this one.
We also had pipe cleaners and Hershey's kisses.  So we made these:

Chocolate bling rings.  With only four other girls in her class, it wasn't a daunting project.
E especially adores her teacher, so she wanted to make something special for her.  Finally, a purpose for the mason jars I've been keeping!  We had Mod Podge and tissue paper.  Even little B got do make one.  This  one was all E's work.  We filled it with Hershey's Milk Chocolate Kisses.

E also has a party at her after school care at La Petite.  More Valentines in order.  This time, I was extra lazy (all of 20 minutes to make 28).  Card stock and we had on hand, another fun font and classic kid Valentine play on words and a different sort of sweet treat.

Last, but not least, B also needed Valentines for her class.  Frankly, I'm the one who wanted to try this.  I bought heart shaped ice cube trays from the bargain aisle at Target ages ago to try it.  Crayon bits in a 275 degree oven for 10 minutes (watch carefully).  E swooned when she saw them--"those are SO beautiful."

Again, card stock and fun font.  I put them each a lollipop bag and stapled them on the front of the card along with a Valentine rainbow fruit roll up on the back (little kids like treats).  

And done!  I didn't even have to stay up past midnight to get it all done.  And considering that the 72 hours I had at home also included a Mardi Gras parade, a chocolate festival and dinner with my parents.  We'll call this a productive and super fun weekend.

Resolution for 2013

I have one primary resolution for 2013 and that is to do more things that will result in me being happy.

This does not mean everything I do will necessarily delight me, but rather I will engage or focus on doing things that will help get me (and my family) to a happy place.  For instance, I am happiest when my house is neat and clean.  This means that even though cleaning does not make me happy, I will need to figure out a better housekeeping schedule and child chore list to help get the house in a place that makes me smile and relax, no matter what room I enter or who has come to the door.  Another example is that, currently, every time I look in the mirror or see a picture of me, I am distressed by the state of my physique (don’t get me started about the number on the scale).  So even though I loathe exercise, I will find time and a plan that I will stick to, make me want to look in the mirror again and, more importantly, be able to easily keep pace with my very active girls.

This resolution isn't meant to be all about doing hard stuff "for the greater good" though.  I love to learn, to make things, to entertain, to volunteer, to read and to write.  This resolution is about making positive changes to how I manage my time to ensure I spend more time doing these things. 

I don’t expect to achieve Nirvana by keeping this resolution.  I don’t even expect to get a perpetually sparkly house out of the deal, but I hope to get closer to a home, a body, mind and spirit that are less stressed and more fun.   And if I can get back into my cute DKNY jeans and sweet BCBG suits while I’m at it, all the better!

On the 12th day of Christmas the blogger gave to thee--bad poetry!

I think that I shall never see
A task annoying like dismantling a tree
I've cut myself and broken things
And I'm beginning to loathe angel wings.
The lights are down and packed away
And may ne'er again see the light of day.
Still, I'll admit it's sad to see
A space once full
Is now empty.

No good deed goes unpunished or Lessons in the joy of giving from a 5 year old

I thought I was so clever finding a scout elf, for my girls, who isn’t interested in expensive couture apparel and appreciates a more modest skirt length in a more traditional, Polar style, even though it might slightly resemble the pattern of a $3 knit bottle coozie from Target. 

Then I took my girls shopping last night at our local big T.  The only two reasons we were there were to get snacks to put in E’s class’s snack barrel and to select pajamas and books to contribute to La Petite’s participation in the Great Sprout Tuck-In.  

  Well, in the book department, such that it is, there just so happens to be an Elf on the Shelf adoption station.  There were no elves to adopt, but there were some elf accessories, including some “limited edition Elf couture” skirts. 

  E was delighted.  “Mommy!  Look at this!  Looks like I found a present for Samantha,” she gushed, while grinning ear to ear, so proud of having found what had to be the most perfect elf gift ever.

  “Do you really think it’s something she’d like?” I respond.

  “Oh, yes.  Look it’s special for the Elf on the Shelf,” she says pointed carefully to the words on the display.  “Please, Mommy, please, can we get this present for Samantha?”

  See, now this is what you get for trying to teach your children the joy of giving AND the belief in Christmas magic.  How could I say ‘no’?  After all, we were there to buy gifts for strangers and she’d been great and thoughtful with that. 

  “Well, if you think she’d really like it.”

  “Yes!  Can we get her a card to thank her for being such a good elf?”

  “I think she’d probably like it more if you made her one.”

  “Yes, but won’t she see?  I want it to be a surprise”

  “No, I’ll tell her to give you some privacy and stay upstairs until after bedtime.” 

  Grin.  “Okay.”

  E took so much delight in making the “card” and wrapping the present.  She was so happy to put the present where Samantha could see it.  It was beyond sweet (I may have gotten a cavity watching it all).

Both girls were so excited to see Samantha wearing the new skirt and E was beside herself over the thank you note she received.  It was worth the ridiculous $6.96 for tiny piece of fabric--cheaper than a movie and more entertaining and definitely more memorable.

Samantha is responsible for the snowflakes.  She's a messmaker, that one.

Please follow links for information on  the Great Sprout Tuck-In and how you can support the Pajama Program.